Hi again Tom!
Sorry I took so long to respond. Somehow I overlooked your post at first.
They say the only stupid question is the one not answered, so do not feel badly about the questions!
You are correct on both counts regarding these two views of pretty much the same haircut as your original one. One shorter than the other.
quote from Tom....."So what would be the simplest way to ask for this haircut? A 3 on the back, slightly longer on the top with a 2 on the sides, but also allow the little 'tufts' to stay to be able to brush over my ear and have
no fringe?"
Yes until you get to the word tufts. I'd say to Leave a longer tuft of hair in front center. (and this has nothing to do with length over the ears. The length around this area (around the ears) has the length cut by the stylist separately. Depending on the stylist's preference, he/she will cut it before or after the clipper cut and will either use the same clippers or their scissors. Either way, just ask him/her to leave a little touching your ear if that is what you prefer.
As for never using the clippers. Not necessarily. They may still do so, being careful to use 2, 3 or 4 for shorter versions. etc. The only thing they will have to watch out for is that area that's front and center. Using the clippers would make it easy to just cut that the same length as the rest of the top.
Mind you, most clippers have guards that go up to 6, 7, and 8 so a longer style is still possible with them.
Hope this helps!